Legoland (Part 2 of 4)

Lots of anticipation the morning of Legoland. The boys are VERY into legos and Star Wars, so Legoland was even more anticipated than Disneyland.



The lego figures were so life-like and impressive.

Torin and Ashen were taken with the Star Wars lego displays. They are so huge and detailed. A scene for every episode. We must have gone back four times. 

They have a new Star Wars figurine walk with about fifteen characters. 

An unexpected bonus: A spray park! As Bereket napped in the stroller, I walked out to the parking lot with her to retrieve swimsuits in the trunk. She was a happy camper when she woke up to  this!

Cute little safari ride. 

...and more Star Wars (do you see a theme?)

A great day trip. Wouldn't spend more than a day there, but it was fun to experience Legoland--which is MUCH less crowded than Disney.

California 2012 (Part 1 of 4)

We planned to travel to Florida in February, but had to cancel that trip because of C@&*#r. A mere three weeks after Mark finished chemo, we packed up and headed down to California to enjoy some family time and FUN! We were overdue and it was such a fun trip for everyone. The trip is direct and short (2.5 hr flight) which feels like a blink compared to some other travels we've taken, so we start the trip off fresh and happy.


Our first stop was Carlsbad--the home of Legoland. We spent our first day at the pool and the beach. The kids were so excited about both. In fact, not to spoil the rest of my posts, but my kids are just as happy in a pool as they are at an expensive theme park (note to self).

The boys RACED down to the pool, which we had to ourselves.

Happy people.

This beach is beautiful. Wonderful sand and waves. We only had one incident in which Torin was toppled by a wave and had to be rescued. Twas reminiscent of an incident I had at the same age in Malibu. Like mother like son.

Lots of time to be goofy.

The boys were excited to share a HUGE bed in the same room as mom and dad. Bereket slept in a pack in play in the bathroom, which was as large as her bedroom.

Waking up to the waves is pretty dreamy. Then we were off to Legoland!

 

Cousins

Bereket and Avalie, June 2012

Bereket Dances

There is something timeless about time lapse photography. Too bad the quality is so poor when transferring to Youtube. You get the idea...

Hair Day

Hair is a pretty big deal around here. Bereket's hair in particular is a super big deal. She has gorgeous hair. However, she has always had a hard time having her hair done. It is so painful for her to have her hair touched--and the biggest bang for our time is to do a long-term hairstyle like twists (I need to expand my repertoire of long-term hairstyles). It requires 1.5-2 hours, but lasts 2-3 weeks--so that averages out to less than 10 minutes/day. If I leave her hair free, it easily tangles and requires me to manipulate it (rinse, detangle, etc) daily, which is painful for both of us. However, it seems that the pain has intensified as she has gotten older and/or she has bad associations with having her hair done. It was getting to the point where we were both dreading hair time. Ugh. I was at my wits end, feeling awful for making my daughter suffer, and also totally wiped out by her crying during hair time. It felt like a lose-lose situation.

As hair time approached this week, I remembered an old post on the adoption forum I used to read all.the.time. (Shout out, forum friends!). I remembered a woman who had a 3 year old daughter who had similar sensitivities with her scalp. She doped her up with tylenol and ibuprofun a couple hours before hair time. I tried it. It works!!!! My darling daughter sat for 2 hours, watching Angelina Ballerina, eating snacks and was SILENT!! I periodically asked her how her head felt and she said, "good" and I pinched myself and screamed cries of joy silently behind her. Hallelujah! She LOVES her twists and finds herself shaking her head to see them twirl around her. It is a beautiful thing--the medicinal remedy and her hair.

p.s. Two posts in one day?! Yeah!

Alive and Well

Hello again dear blog readers!

We are coming up out of the ashes of the last six months. The fact that I'm even blogging at this moment implies that things are slowly returning to normal around here. 'Normal' is definitely new normal since the experience of cancer has changed our lives forever. We no longer innocently assume that we will live healthfully into our 90's. Each day we are alive is truly a gift, and we intend to live more purposefully and aware of moments that we want to savor and remember.

Though the fear of a recurrence will haunt us in the coming years, we intentionally strive to focus on the day at hand, rather than worry about our future. We learned that the hard way over the last six months. There were many many days when worry about the future seeped in and overwhelmed me. It struck hard from the moment we learned that cancer was a (very slight) possibility in early December. I spent several days weeping at night and in the shower, living the possibility of losing my beloved. It was awful. After I faced that, I moved on and decided to take each day as it came. It didn't come easily. Each day I had to remind myself over and over again that I would not worry about tomorrow, but only today, and today he was okay, and we were okay. There was never a time when we felt abandoned by God or totally alone. Though there were days where we felt alone in our experience, we were very supported by our friends and family, which made things so much more bearable.

There was an unsettling air in our home the last months. Between Mark feeling totally unlike himself, and me feeling stretched to compensate for what he couldn't provide, the kids were forced to adapt to a difficult situation. It was hard for them to understand why Mark was low on energy and impatient with things that never bothered him before. They certainly enjoyed seeing him more often since he took off an extra two days every other week. Over the last month there have been many days when they've asked if he could stay home from work.

Yesterday I looked through my last year's worth of photos. There was a stark contract between the first six months and the last six months. The last six months were just surviving. Our times of fun were limited, and usually involved being at the beach. There is a calm that our family feels at the beach.

We are feeling peaceful despite some unknowns. Mark had his first post-treatment CT scan last week. It was clear (!) and we are grateful.

We are grateful for so many things that went well the last six months: that Mark was diagnosed quickly and early. That he had Hodgkin's lymphoma (highly curable) and not another type of lymphoma, that we have great insurance that paid for all but a few hundred dollars of his entire treatment, for guidance we received while navigating treatment options, for our family's health during his treatment...not one cold! For all of the encouragement we received from those near and far in tangible and intangible ways. For the gift of good attitudes that gave both of us the willingness to face each day with gusto.

I don't often blog about our faith on this blog, but to be authentic about the last six months--our faith is what carried us through each day, often through moments that felt like the darkness would overshadow us. It's hard to articulate such a personal, spiritual thing, but I will try. As Christians, we don't have assurance that God will heal our illnesses or answer our prayers in the way we want. What we are sure of is that there is a beautiful life waiting for us after this one, and that Jesus is alongside us each day of this life. We never felt alone--left to despair. We had hope. Of course, our desire was (and is) for Mark to live a long life--but we know that we will both be heading to an eternity in heaven with Jesus and that gives us comfort in the unknown. Mark's strength is in God--he drew upon the foundation of faith he built over the last 15+ years. We felt the earth move under us, but we did not break. I am so thankful that we felt God's comfort, reassurance, sovereignty and love over the last six months in a way that was palpable. It makes me want to dig even deeper into my faith--because God's love was what gave us the most peace during this storm.

I really hope to revive 3+2=ONE in the coming weeks. I miss taking time to reflect on our everyday life. Life with our three kids is busy and I often collapse after putting them to bed at night, and then we are off to a new day...not taking time to relish in the special moments we have together, or vent about the more frustrating things. This blog has been that place for me to process and remember.

April Photo Download

Wow, this is certainly the longest "blog break" I've taken. Honestly all of our energy has been spent trying to keep our family afloat in the midst of chemo. The great news is that Mark's PET scan he had in March showed that the cancer is no longer detectable in his body. He still has to complete his 8 infusions (last one is next Thursday), but we have peace knowing that the chemo did it's job. In the absence of the blog to keep a record of life, I've continued taking photos. I thought I'd share a few for those of you who have missed my kids :-)

Starting with the lowlight: Moments before Torin vomited all over me in one of our local restaurants. I was alone with all three kids. Looking at the pictures I took, I should have known he was sick. It was a mess. I was embarrassed. I haven't been back since :-(

Afternoon at the beach...with ice cream. 

  

I think Mark is going to have a serious hunch from working so much with the boys' on lego projects. #worldsbestdad. 

Guess who? :-)

  

I take waaaay too many pictures of her. I had to hold myself back on this post to try to keep some gender balance between the kids' photos. 

More time at the beach. We've been to the beach once or twice a week in April. It helps that it's 5 minutes away. 

  

Night before Easter I realized I forgot to buy basket stuffers. Oops. Fortunately I scrounged a few things I had tucked away for a rainy day. Kids were over the moon, and there wasn't even any candy.

Ridiculous.

Three hams.

Ashen is going to lose his bottom teeth any day. I've been taking lots of pictures of him lately to preserve his "baby smile" in my photo annals. He makes me swoon.

    

I had the honor and pleasure of being at my sister's birth on 4/6/12. My sweet niece Avalie was born in the wee hours of the morning. She is perfect.

My third niece, Hannah, was born four days later 4/10/12. I cannot get enough photos of her by text from my brother. She is amazing.

Ashen and Bereket loved holding her too. 

 

#cousinlove

 Hopefully I'll be back with more "words" in the coming weeks. Chemo is over next week!!!

2/2/12: Four

Four.

He is four today, and so happy to be it.

I am in disbelief that four years could go so quickly. As I was recalling to him yesterday evening, what was happening on the eve of his birth four years ago, I remember it clearly. It is hard to believe how much has happened between then an now. I remember the feeling of the first contractions. I remember going to sleep with the TENS unit and waking up at 7am, and starting real labor. I remember soaking in the tub at the hospital for hours, laughing and talking with my doula and mom and Mark. I remember how hard it was to push his gigantic head out of my body. I remember the surreal experience of feeling Torin Isaiah for the first time, and how I fell madly in love with him as he lay on my chest...like it was yesterday.

He is quite a boy. His teacher told me yesterday at his parent/teacher conference that he is kind, calm, confident and assertive. That is different than I would have described him a year ago. At home is is also quite physical (illustrated in the below video) and loud, likes making any kind of art, and is busy imagining with planes, transformers, legos--while making a lot of sound effects. His favorite activities involve playing with his parents--playing chase being his first choice. His attention span is astounding. This year he has become very focused, and less wild. He is favoring quiet indoor play for physical play (maybe that's because it's too cold right now to play outside). He loves to cuddle when he feels like it (on his terms) and still melts me.

He is also quite sneaky. He has been known to sneak food into the bathroom (yikes!) and my iPad into his room (as we're trying to get out the door, no less). He always has a good excuse as to why he did something. He is a convincing and charming little fellow and definitely gets away with more than he should. 

He had his first meal at Red Robin today--including the famous "Happy Happy Birthday" song which stunned him, but with a quick recovery since there was a "giant fluffy ice cream" in front of him when the singers disappeared. He had a playdate with friends this morning, got to watch Cars 2 (a rare midweek treat), and had his choice of dinner: hotdogs, macaroni, strawberries, blueberries and popsicles instead of cake.

He is having his first "kid party" this weekend, which he is really looking forward to--he's been asking about when his birthday is coming since early November when it was Ashen and Bereket's birthdays. He is sure that his Uncle Stephen is buying him 40 different lego sets for his birthday because they looked at them together online a few weeks ago, which to a 3 (now 4) year old, means he is buying them all. He is very interested in Star Wars (though he's never seen the movie).

I may add to this later since I feel like I'm missing a lot of details. My brain is not totally sharp this evening, but I wanted to share a snapshot of this precious little man on his birthday. I am so lucky to be his mom. Life is so much richer and sweeter with him in it. 

Malia

I don't often blog details about family or friends, but I couldn't help but blog about some dear friends of ours today. We are lucky to have Mike & Mary in our lives. Our lives are intertwined in so many ways.  Unlike most couple friendships where the women are close friends and the men are close friends, our friendships go all ways. Mike and I met my sophomore year, and we were housemates my junior year. Mary and I were housemates our senior year. Mark and Mary spent a summer together in India. Mike traveled to Kenya to spend a few weeks with me early in my year there. Mary and I roadtripped from Mike's place in Texas (when he was in the airforce) back to the Northwest through the Grand Canyon. She traveled to Kenya to spend time with me there at the end of my year there. Mike and Mark worked together for a couple years at an engineering firm. Mary and I have been a part of a weekly bible study (those women are a lifeline and deserve their own post) for over ten years. They celebrate with us when we're up and support us when we're down. They are always there in tangible and intangible ways. She is a doctor, and has been so helpful to me the last couple of months as we navigated pre-diagnosis and now treatment options. She spent over an hour talking through a Hodgkin's clinical study with me the other night. It was just what I needed. 

Mark and Mike were often asked if they were brothers when they worked together. There is a resemblance :-) Photo circa 2003. 

Mary and I on our way to Jackson, Mississippi to learn about racial reconciliation (2000)

Last year they had a baby. We love Malia Mae. She is delightful. We are so honored to be her godparents and to be in her life. For Mary's shower last year (actually late 2010), we decided to make her a group craft. I finally finished it last week for Malia's first birthday. It is colorful and happy...just like Malia. 

We hope our kids grow up to be great friends.

Peace

The kids are enjoying coloring together of late. I print off several coloring pages of their choice off of the internet and they get to work. It buys me at least 15 minutes of peace and quiet. Lovely.

It's All Fun and Games Until Someone Gets Hurt

This scene is everyday life around here. What does it remind you of?

Plant Based Pizza

I've gotten lots of requests from people who want more ideas about how to cook more whole foods, plants based meals. I am just on the beginning of this journey, but will do my best to share what I can in the limited time I have to blog. First, I have to recommend that you watch Forks Over Knives and Engine 2, both can be streamed on Netflix, and read The China Study. Very convincing to steer us toward plants-based foods. It's hard to argue with the fact that more nutrients are found in plants than in any other food. We all know we should eat our fruits and vegetables. What I didn't know is that you can get all of your protein from plants, just as easily as you can from animal-based foods. And I didn't realize that on average, 63% of what Americans eat are empty-calories...foods with no nutrients. Did you know that meat and milk have almost no nutritious content? I didn't.

Mark and I LOVE pizza. Last night I recreated it with 100% whole wheat crust and no cheese. I thought I'd share because though it tasted healthy, it actually tasted good.

Crust: Whole Wheat Pizza Crust. I used honey instead of sugar, and 3 1/4 cup of whole wheat pastry flour instead of using any unbleached white flour.

Load your pizza up with extra sauce (I bought some San Marzano sauce which we love), and then all the veggies your heart could desire. I put spinach, grilled mushroom and onions, artichoke hearts, olives and tomatoes. Then I topped it with a sprinkling of some ground cashews.

We will definitely make this again.

Let it Snow

Snow is a BIG deal in these parts, because it almost never snows. We're lucky if it snows once a year. This weekend and this week calls for a series of snow 'storms.' We can't wait. We went out yesterday right after church to enjoy the first inch of snow. I am so thankful that Bereket loves snow now. I was worried last year--see here.

My amazing husband decided that two days after chemo, though his brain is a bit foggy, he had the energy to shovel the sidewalk. He's out doing that again today...

Mark got a Kinect for Christmas and the boys have played the Disney Matterhorn game a couple of times where they throw snowballs at yetis. They love it. They love throwing real snowballs even more, and have enjoyed pretending one or the other of them (or us) is a yeti. Ha!

Good thing they practiced  their snow angels:-)